Prologue +++ Operation ‘Screw The Authority’ hits back +++ The slightly embarrassing rest +++ The parts I don’t want to talk about +++ Epilogue

"Guys, guys! Guys... I understand all of your testosterone driven competitiveness that's going on right now. But enough of this whole prettiest-girl-at-the-dance argument routine you got going on, okay? Cause we're not dancing tonight, boys, we're fighting. We've got a six-man-tag against Kane, Randy Orton and Triple H's little bad boy Seth Rollins. Now, the Authority always has a plan. But tonight, I got a plan of my own. It's called 'Operation Screw The Authority' and it starts when you two stop arguing, we get together and kick their asses." --DEAN AMBROSE.
“Guys, guys! Guys… I understand all of your testosterone driven competitiveness that’s going on right now. But enough of this whole prettiest-girl-at-the-dance argument routine you got going on, okay? Cause we’re not dancing tonight, boys, we’re fighting. We’ve got a six-man-tag against Kane, Randy Orton and Triple H’s little bad boy Seth Rollins. Now, the Authority always has a plan. But tonight, I got a plan of my own. It’s called ‘Operation Screw The Authority’ and it starts when you two stop arguing, we get together and kick their asses.” –DEAN AMBROSE.

Prologue
Dean Ambrose Every regular reader of this little blog will already know that I complain about anything and everything. It’s basically impossible to satisfy me with segments on RAW or Main Event or SmackDown or some PPV, except your name is Dean Ambrose. But, I might have complained a bit too much in recent months because how the hell should I write my review for this RAW episode without failing completely in telling you how bad it really was?

I could really write this episode within three-hundred words and it would be still too much. Maybe expectations were set a bit too high before. Or there were too many possibilities for the very finish of RAW made up during the show but just didn’t happen in the end, that the feeling left was pure disappointment. The not so funny point was that I even watched it live this time. But I’ll do so next Monday as well perhaps, because the RAW after a PPV is basically always a Blow-the-Roof-Off kind of thing.

But like I already said: except for the Dean Ambrose part, this review will be quite short because I don’t want to waste my time today.

Operation ‘Screw The Authority’ hits back
Dean Ambrose This time, Jesus Chr… pardon… John Cena kicked off RAW to basically promote the WWE Network. Even Super Reigns is hyped by Cena despite both of them are stuck in some kind of a feud at the moment. Reigns also came out to give Cena some of his own words back. Sidenote here: damn it, Reigns, speak clearly and don’t mumble into your Klingon beard. If you go on like this, creative can spare the time on writing your promos to just make up a better storyline for the whole show. You then just need to mumble some unheard words. Little girls will scream for you anyway, I’m afraid.

At some point of arguing between Super Cena and Super Reigns, Dean Ambrose at backstage apparently had enough of it. With above already written down words he reminded the two of them that they had a match later this evening, so they should stop bickering to be on the same page for that match. At this point, Dean Ambrose might have finally got an idea how it was for Seth Rollins to be the glue of The Shield all the time when Dean Ambrose and Super Reigns fought their verbal fights with each other.

Dean Ambrose But then, when he was finished, Dean Ambrose noticed that he wasn’t alone. Kane and Seth Rollins had surrounded him already; Randy Orton joined the party when Dean Ambrose kicked off the brawl against Kane. During around two minutes of the beat-down – most Divas matches are shorter than this – Dean Ambrose was thrown against some garage gate, some wall and choke-slammed by Kane unto some crate. Of course, as a former participant in Death Matches and Barbed Wire Matches, this was something that just amused Dean Ambrose. Actually he asked his three opponents: “Is that all you guys got?”. The answer was a Curb Stomp by Seth Rollins that left Dean Ambrose finally speechless.

Since Reigns and Cena could watch on the Titantron what happened to Dean Ambrose, you might ask yourself why they didn’t help him with rushing backstage instantly. Well, they did. Just for the WWE cameras not showing the majority of viewers, i.e. the people in front of the telly. The angle basically was to leave Dean Ambrose out of the main event match on RAW and later on also Seth Rollins, so all the focus was on the four people who will be in this Fatal-4-Way match. You could ask now, why the hell Dean Ambrose and Seth Rollins were in this match when one of them was beat up so he couldn’t participate while the other one supposedly got injured in the latter stages of the actual match. The four men were on their own just for a few moments to hit some finishers on each other with Super Reigns standing tall after a spear on Randy Orton to finish RAW.

Of course, I’ve got some conspiracy theory on this, i.e. the following. First of all: everything the WWE commentators talk about, is an angle, i.e. made up and part of the storylines. Dean Ambrose then wasn’t that hard beaten up. At least, he didn’t sell any injury. He was bleeding a bit from his chin but this and his ripped shirt couldn’t have hurt him that badly. During the whole show it was said that Dean Ambrose was brought to a ‘local hospital’ to check on him. So, in reality that obviously wasn’t the case. But still, on Main Event commentators will update on Dean Ambrose’s condition. Certainly he’ll show up for his match against Seth Rollins at Battleground.

As for Seth Rollins, that was a bit harder to tell because cameras didn’t show him anymore after he hit his knee. You could barely notice some medics checking on him. And after the show there were reports from people in the crowd that Seth Rollins looked hurt for real and was supposedly ‘limping’ out of the arena. But: the commentators shortly referred to a knee injury on Seth Rollins. They didn’t sell it for the remainder of the show because the focus now was on the four guys that are in the Fatal-4-Way match on Sunday. And this was also the cause why Seth Rollins had to be out ‘injured’ for these last few minutes.

Many people thought that Seth Rollins would try to cash in again, just for Dean Ambrose to interrupt him again. But: this would have been the scenario for the third RAW in a row and with Battleground right around the corner, focus needed to be on the main event match there. And that leads us to my conspiracy theory. Let’s face it: no-one really cares about this Fatal-4-Way match; everyone wants to see Dean Ambrose vs Seth Rollins. So, the two of them without injuries would probably steal the show. With their promos and heat for each other for the last month, not to mention their first match encounter at Money In The Bank, the hype for this match is huge. Also the expectations. Now, that they are both ‘injured’, will WWE make them fight in wheelchairs or something like that? Just to make sure that this match won’t be the best of the evening? It’s a given that I know that these two men are capable of blowing the roof off with a match against each other. But I really doubt now that they will have the chance because of this basically meaningless Fatal-4-Way match. Because: when actually happened a title change at an actual PPV for the last time? Super Cena will retain his title(s). Believe that!

The slightly embarrassing rest
There were actually some fun moments in this in-ring debate between Lana and Zeb Colter with Michael Cole as the man in the middle. Lana got huge heat this time and did a good job in promoting Rusev vs Jack Swagger on Sunday. Colter on the other side told us some war stories and finally got slapped by Lana. Probably for just being there. The little brawl between Rusev and Swagger finished in a draw when Rusev was able to flee the Patriot Lock. He won’t be that lucky on Sunday.

And the second segment that wasn’t that embarrassing was Chris Jericho vs Bray Wyatt although Jericho’s entrance was the best part of this segment. Last week I told you some riddles on the craziness of WWE at the moment. This time I’ll make myself clear: Dean Ambrose and his gimmick are second-to-none. It works because he’s used to it. But WWE jumping the bandwagon, trying to make everyone possible kind of ‘crazy’ – The Usos and now Jericho – won’t work. Because of two reasons: everyone will be compared with Dean Ambrose; everyone else but him will fail. And: the WWE Universe will miss the old gimmicks. At this very moment, I couldn’t care less about Chris Jericho because of this ‘crazy’ talking by him.

The parts I don’t want to talk about
There were five – FIVE – backstage segments with Triple H, Stephanie McMahon, Kane, Randy Orton and Seth Rollins in various combinations to promote the several relationships within The Authority. I’ve got it now: Kane and Orton can’t stand each other while Daddy Triple H and Mum Steph are very proud of their pet Seth Rollins.

The Miz… it was a great time without him in WWE. I miss these days.

Dolph Ziggler now has got two women by his side. And the two women like it being used in a very sexist way.

And is it even possible for Damien Sandow (and also Adam Rose as of late) to be used more riciculously than to do live commercials backstage? I don’t think so. If this is becoming a permanent item, I will start a petition for Damien Sandow.

While Michael Cole told us that it was extremely doubtful that Dean Ambrose would appear at the main event match, Super Cena just seconds later told us that Dean Ambrose would have been out. Super Cena is now a doctor, too.

First I thought the temporary break-up of Cesaro and Paul Heyman could mean he would jump the ship from Cesaro to Dean Ambrose. But it’s probably only teasing that Brrrock Lesnarrr will come back on coming RAW after Battleground.

After her match AJ Lee impersonates CM Punk with sitting on the announcers table Indian style to talk with Paige who was on commentary. They pretend being best buddies.

Ric Flair was drunk again.

Epilogue
Everything else I haven’t mentioned in here, I just didn’t care at all or it was that bad that I refuse to remember. Don’t get me wrong: I’m not a mad Dean Ambrose fan who thumbs down just because Dean Ambrose just got four minutes of the show. It couldn’t be further from the truth. Because if Dean Ambrose gets around forty minutes of every single WWE show, people could have enough of him at some stage. There needs to be some variation. And these four minutes were still good with lots of speculation material innit. I just don’t like that WWE buries actual entertaining and talented wrestlers while guys or gals without real talent get matches and / or wins. Then again, hyping one guy without actual limit. And a show with a plot that appeared like cut into little pieces. Plus a finish that looked so screwed up that this could have been the Operation Screw The Authority by Dean Ambrose may have worked indeed.

PS. Yes, CM Punk was indeed mentioned again. Since his contract is about to expire within the next few days, probably WWE has finally given up on him coming back in showing his documentary on the WWE Network. So, Punk wasn’t mentioned by the commentators but there was this commercial for him. One of the recent WWE Countdowns was all about shocking comebacks. If CM Punk will come back at any time in the far future, that comeback will be instantly number One. That’s for sure!


The Gifs for this review were made by raphie-loves-the-shield / hiitsmekevin / jonathangood.

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